Need a pick-me-up to survive the workday? Let’s be honest, some days feel like you’re stuck in a never-ending loop of emails and drowning in a mountain of tasks. But fear not, because a little humor goes a long way! From the meeting that could’ve been an email to the ongoing mystery of the broken coffee machine, funny work quotes remind us that we’re all navigating this chaos together. So, hit pause, grab your least-judgmental mug, and enjoy these hilarious quotes that make the grind just a little less grueling!
I am a friend of the workingman, and I would rather be his friend, than be one.
Clarence Darrow
I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
Jerome K. Jerome
The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What’s the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you’d get a pulse.
Dennis Miller
An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field.
Niels Bohr
If you must have motivation, think of your paycheck on Friday.
Noel Coward
Nothing is so embarrassing as watching someone do something that you said couldn’t be done.
Sam Ewing
Find a job you like and you add five days to every week.
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
You can’t just ask customers what they want and then try to give that to them. By the time you get it built, they’ll want something new.
Steve Jobs
Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood.
Bill Murray
Anyone who can walk to the welfare office can walk to work.
Al Capp
Nothing is work unless you’d rather be doing something else.
George Halas
Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all.
Sam Ewing
It is better to have one person working with you than three people working for you.
Dwight D. Eisenhower
The reward for good work is more work.
Jonas Salk
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.
Homer Simpson
If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock.
Claude McDonald
It’s finally Friday, I’m free again. I got my motor running for a wild weekend.
George Jones
There’s no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it?
Kin Hubbard
I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
Charles Lamb
Doing nothing is very hard to do… you never know when you're finished.
Leslie Nielsen
People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
Ogden Nash
If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn't have a job if he was any smarter.
John Gotti
Why do people say they wish every day was Friday? If it was always Friday, we'd be here every freakin' day.
Ed Bernard
It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.
Bill Gates
People who never do any more than they get paid for, never get paid for any more than they do.
Elbert Hubbard
By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.
Robert Frost
People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well neither does bathing. That’s why we recommend it daily.
Zig Ziglar
If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
Steven Wright
The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.
Joe Girard
Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.
Don Herold
No man goes before his time, unless the boss leaves early.
Groucho Marx
Most of what we call management consists of making it difficult for people to get their work done.
Peter Drucker
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
George Carlin
Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar.
Drew Carey
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.
Mark Twain
If A equals' success, then the formula is A = X + Y + Z. Where X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut.
Albert Einstein
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.
Robert Orben
The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application form.
Stanley J. Randall
Going to work for a large company is like getting on a train. Are you going sixty miles an hour or is the train going sixty miles an hour and you're just sitting still?
J. Paul Getty
I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around.
Homer Simpson
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
Edgar Bergen
When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?'
Don Marquis
I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.
Henny Youngman
It's a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. He can't eat for eight hours; he can't drink for eight hours; he can't make love for eight hours. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.
William Faulkner
Delegate your work. Stop spending dollar time on penny jobs.
Mary Kay Ash
If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.
John Gotti
Work is against human nature. The proof is that it makes us tired.
Michel Tournier
Life is too short to work so hard.
Vivian Leigh
I’m working myself to death.
Alan Ladd
Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.
Will Rogers
When I was 16 I worked in a pet store, and they fired me because . . . They had three snakes, and one day I braided them.
Steven Alexander Wright
The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.
Oscar Wilde
I work to stay alive.
Bette Davis
The taxpayer, that's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination.
Ronald Reagan
